Mother woke up every morning around 6 o'clock, and thats how I got up every morning for school. She never thought about waking up me or Jake. If it wasn't for me, I dont think Jake would be up and ready every morning. Mother would go sit in the bathroom, shower, and get ready. Combing her long brown hair, she'd put it up in her clip, put on some red shiny lip stick and head off to work. Once in awhile we would get a "bye" but not often.
When mother would leave, I'd go into the kitchen and make me and Jake lunch. Adding extra jelly, and cutting off the crust, I'd throw his sandwich in his bag, and set it by the door. I know that Jake was old enough to make his own sandwich, but If I didn't, then he would go without lunch for the day.
"Jake, wake up! You have 35 minutes to get dressed and catch the bus. C'mon. If we miss the bus, then were not going to have a ride too school."
"I know, give me 3 more minutes." said Jake. He was basically whispering.
"Fine, Im showering first, and then you can take one and have the cold water." Lily walked away in tears. It wasn't because she was mad or upset, she was more stressed than anything. Jake wasn't her responsibility, but she was always mothering him.
This was a good story Kelcie! I liked how it's the story of her mother just leaving the parenting to Lily. This story is interesting and I wonder what the ending is going to be like. I wish I could read more of what will happen with the mother and daughter's relationship:)
ReplyDeleteI loved this! I like how you put in the detail about making Jake's lunch with the extra jelly because it showed how much Lily really did take care of Jake. I wonder what would happen if you wrote more to this story. I wish you had. :)
ReplyDeleteI really really like this, it seems so real, and it happens to families everyday. I wonder what will happen next and i wish you could have added more to this because i wanted to read on.
ReplyDeleteI really liked how you described the relationship between mother and children and how it affected the daughters life. I wonder how Jake thinks about the situation. I wish you would describe Jake more because he is an important part but he is not really mentioned. Good Job Kelcie!
ReplyDeleteI really liked this! I This how you used humor even though it was a stressful time when you said I'm going to take a shower first and you can have the cold water. I wonder what's going to happen to jake and lily. I wish you had wrote more. Awesome Job :)
ReplyDelete